POSITIVE PARENTING STRATEGIES

Every parent wants their children to be successful in life, but no parent wants their children to face problems or take on challenges. It’s like expecting to reap without sowing. Generally, parents train and program their children’s minds to enjoy comforts and luxuries but do not prepare them to face hardships and challenges in life. Whatever we sow in the subconscious mind of our children will grow and blossom  in their thoughts and behaviors.

One common mistake parents make is raising children in excessive comfort zones without exposing them to real-world challenges. This is counterproductive—it only delays those challenges, which may later appear in more intense forms. That’s why even highly educated individuals and professionals may turn to drugs or commit suicide instead of facing life’s difficulties. Life is not a bed of roses; it’s often a bed of thorns.

The comfort zone is a beautiful place—but nothing ever grows there. It’s one of the worst addictions because it keeps you away from success. If you want your children to be successful, teach them that there is no alternative to hard work and no shortcut to success. Encourage them to work hard and develop self-discipline.

To me, hard work means leaving your comfort zone, and discipline is what keeps you out of it. The golden thread that runs through every successful and meaningful life is self-discipline. The tougher you are on yourself, the easier life will be on you. It’s rightly said that motivation gets you going, but discipline keeps you growing. Discipline and consistency are the keys to success. Consistency transforms you from average to excellent—but it is also the rarest of human qualities. Remaining consistent is hard due to constant distractions, and distraction is the biggest enemy of success.

In today’s world, the biggest distraction for children is the use of smartphones and other electronic gadgets. According to one survey, 71% of children are addicted to using smartphones and other devices.

Every parent should work on shaping their child’s mindset, boosting their confidence, and helping them build a strong belief system. To succeed in life, a child needs a strong belief system. For example, a deer runs at 90 km/h, while a lion runs at 58 km/h—yet the lion still catches the deer. Why? Because of the lion’s belief system. The lion believes it is the king of the jungle and acts with confidence and power. The deer’s speed is defeated by the lion’s belief.

So your belief system can either make or break you. A strong belief system can help your child become mentally strong and pursue their dreams with hope. A weak belief system can make them mentally fragile and lead to a sense of hopelessness.

Failure is a part of life, but real life begins when you rise after every fall and prove your worth. The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. A boy does not become a man through age—he becomes a man through pain, failure, rejection, and heartbreak. Teach your children to turn obstacles into stepping stones for success.

Knowledge and good planning are essential for a successful life. Information is not knowledge; the only true source of knowledge is experience. Experience comes from applying knowledge, and this practice leads to wisdom. A thoughtful and planned approach is more likely to lead to success than impulsive or reactive behavior.

Golden Points for Positive Parenting:

Teach your children how to plan their day to balance work, rest, and play (Time Management).

Teach them how to recognize and nurture positive relationships.

Teach them basic techniques for personal safety.

Teach them how to stay focused and avoid distractions (Self-Discipline).

Teach them how to resolve disagreements without escalating conflict.

Teach them how to remain flexible and open to change (Adaptability).

Teach them how to manage their emotions and understand others (Emotional Intelligence).

Teach them how to bounce back from setbacks (Resilience).

Teach them the importance of saving and investing wisely.

Encourage them to care about others’ feelings (Empathy).

Encourage them to explore new ideas and think creatively (Creativity).

Encourage them to take initiative and inspire others (Leadership).

Encourage them to think critically and find solutions (Problem Solving).

Encourage them to persevere, even in the face of difficulties (Perseverance).

Dr. Javaid Bhat is a consultant pediatrician at SDH Kupwara, and he can be reached at,
drjavaidbhat22@gmail.com